I Don't Know Why

Toddler's pants legs
are almost four inches too short for him.  We bought them seven months ago, and at the time they were at his heel.  We haven't measured him yet, but I wonder, if his pants legs are this short, is it possible his upper half has grown an equal amount?  Is he eight inches taller?  It's unlikely.  But just a few inches surely makes the world look like a very different place to him: So many big walls have become just fences to look over.



Eight Feet
is the estimation of how much Japan moved, at least part of it, due to the earthquake.  It wasn't until the last friend emailed to say she was safe, alone and terrified, but safe, that I felt shook to my core.  The aftermath is terrible.  I have watched not much. I have watched enough to drive me to my knees whenever I can't be distracted.  Eight feet and the world unveils her face to show what she's been all this time: So much more unsteady than we like to think; our lives so small and delicate.  God becomes so much bigger in our eyes. A dear friend posted of Psalm 103:13-18 on Facebook.  I am thankful she did.

Unbearable
And, somehow in all this, we went to church and led worship.  We helped build a new playground. (well...toddler and I mostly played in the huge mound of sand)  And the knowledge that I was distracted is unbearable to my heart.  But my head knows it's better to pray and do something good. There are so many who are deeply living this tragedy, in need of rest, in need of someone to serve them.  For me to be so selfishly dramatic that I exhibit the same response as those immersed in this tragedy, well, is simply foolish.

Pray
While I want to jump on a plane and dream of giving away the flesh of my body and marrow of my bones to help (yes, I am that dramatic).  All I can do is pray with every fiber of my being.  It's all many of us can do.  We can also give to organizations that are mobilized to help.

I Don't Know Why
things happen like this. This song has been running through my head, even though the images might not match perfectly, the theme is still a comfort.